Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
