i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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