don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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