would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Houston, we have a squirter
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Dick very happy bro
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
