Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
