plz talk dirty to me
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
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