yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
