Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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