mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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