I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
