How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Girls should come with a carfax report
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
