Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Also, beer. Big fan.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
