Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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