i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
