I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize