I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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