I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
