my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Come see our sink grown plant.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
