so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
