If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Your penis caused this!
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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