She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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