Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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