hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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