Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
