He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
