do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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