I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
