i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
