Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
