I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
