So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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