Where is the hickey?
I feel like abortions should bother me more
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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