Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
