I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
