Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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