I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
