she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
