summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
