You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I touched a dick in church today
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
