Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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