I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
