Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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