school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize