haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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