Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
