Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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