As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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