omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
