she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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