Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Randomize
